What if the biggest shift in your marriage didn't require your husband to change?

In this conversation, Tyona Vallejo shares her journey from struggling in her own marriage to discovering the power of coaching, nervous system regulation, and radical responsibility. Together we explore how control is often our nervous system searching for safety—and how true connection begins when we learn to trust ourselves first.

We discuss:

• Why waiting for your spouse to change keeps you stuck

• How nervous system regulation transforms conflict

• The connection between perfectionism, control, and safety

• Learning to trust yourself before expecting trust from your relationship

• Creating compassion instead of reacting during difficult moments

• Why healthy marriages are built through connection, not control

What if the person you want to become isn’t as far away as you think?

Today on The Spice of Wife, we’re talking about identity—and how the way you see yourself shapes the way you show up in your health, marriage, motherhood, business, money, and everyday life.

I’m sharing how something as simple as becoming a “hat person” taught me that confidence is just courage compounded over time, (Thank you to the brillant Emily Judice!) plus how identity-based habits can help you stop defining yourself by your circumstances and start intentionally becoming the woman you want to be.

Instead of saying, “That’s just not who I am,” try this:

“I’m learning to become…”

Now you fill in the blank.

What do your calendar and your bank account say you value?

I’m talking about how we can stop feeling like victims of our schedules, obligations, and expenses and start intentionally using our time, money, energy, and resources to create the life we actually want.

We’ll break it down into four pieces: desire, intention, value, and resources—and look at whether the way you’re spending your life actually reflects what matters most to you.

Because your marriage, business, family life, and even the woman you’re becoming don’t happen by accident. We create them with intention.

I'm sharing the recording from a live workshop where I teach one of the most important concepts I've learned as a coach: you don't need better circumstances—you need a regulated nervous system.

If you constantly feel overwhelmed, reactive, exhausted, or like you're carrying everyone else's responsibilities, this episode will help you understand why.

Inside you'll learn:

• Why emotional dysregulation—not your circumstances—is keeping you stuck.

• The difference between living in survival mode and living from peace.

• My Green, Yellow, and Red Zone framework for understanding your emotions.

• The Stop, Drop & Breathe Method to regulate your nervous system in real time.

• How to become calm, grounded, and connected—even when life is still chaotic.

After nearly 20 years behind the chair, Ashley Sweeney has learned that beauty is about so much more than hair.

Ashley shares how walking through divorce became the catalyst for rebuilding not only her business, but herself. We talk about what it means to create genuine community, why collaboration always wins over competition, learning to receive support, navigating co-parenting, setting healthy boundaries, and finding the courage to build a life that truly reflects who you are.

Whether you're navigating a relationship transition, growing a business, or simply trying to reconnect with yourself, this episode is a reminder that you don't have to do it alone.

What if one sentence could completely change the way you see your marriage?

Brooke shares a simple but powerful mindset shift that helps you stop focusing on your husband's behavior and start seeing the human underneath it. This isn't about excusing unhealthy behaviors or pretending everything is okay. It's about creating enough compassion to move from criticism and control into curiosity and connection.

If you've been feeling frustrated, disconnected, or stuck in the same arguments, this episode will give you a practical tool you can start using today.

Is your marriage repairable? Maybe the better question is: Do you want to repair it?

Brooke shares why repair doesn't always mean staying together—it starts with healing yourself first. Through stories, practical insight, and a fresh perspective on recurring conflict, you'll learn why repairing your own triggers and emotional wounds is essential, no matter the outcome of your marriage.

If you've ever wondered whether your relationship is worth fighting for, this will help you explore what repair really looks like.

What if balance isn't about doing everything perfectly?

So many high-achieving women feel like they're constantly failing—guilty at work because they think they should be home, and guilty at home because they think they should be working. But what if that feeling isn't coming from your circumstances... it's coming from the story you're telling yourself?

I'm sharing what balance actually looks like in marriage, motherhood, and business. We'll talk about why balance isn't standing perfectly still—it's learning to trust the back-and-forth, embracing both truths, and finding peace in the tension.

You'll learn:

• Why guilt keeps women feeling stuck and overwhelmed.

• The balance beam analogy that completely changed how I view work and family.

• How to stop believing you're always in the wrong place.

• Why both your marriage and your business can thrive without chasing perfection.

• The powerful mindset shift that helps you feel grounded: "I'm right where I need to be."

If you've been craving more peace, more presence, and less pressure, this episode will help you redefine what balance really looks like.

And if your ready to take everything to the next level join me in my Business Of Marriage program by filling out an application HERE. 

You know what's not working.

You know where you're frustrated.
You know what feels too tight.
You know the patterns you want to break.

So why do we stay stuck?

Brooke shares a simple but powerful lesson she learned while doing laundry: awareness is only the first step. Just like clothes that no longer fit, the beliefs, habits, and relationship patterns that no longer serve us need a system for letting them go.

Today is a special episode because I'm welcoming my very first guest to the podcast! (And will continue to have guests around the world every first wednesday of the month wooo!)

In this conversation, I sit down with spiritual teacher and guide Lizzie Langston to talk about what happens when life, business, and marriage don't go according to plan. We dive into the seasons that stretch us, challenge us, and ultimately transform us.

We talk about:
• Why "coming undone" isn't the end—it's often the beginning of something better.
• How differences in marriage can strengthen partnership instead of divide it.
• Navigating business ownership through financial uncertainty, career changes, and life's unexpected twists.
• Learning to trust your body, your intuition, and yourself.
• Why your marriage doesn't need perfection—it needs partnership.

Whether you're in a season of growth, transition, or rebuilding, this conversation will remind you that you are not behind. Sometimes the strongest marriages are built after everything you thought you knew falls apart.

What if the greatest camp you could send your kids to this summer wasn't football camp or tech camp... but Camp Mom?

I'm sharing what my very first summer home full-time has taught me about motherhood, business, and creating a life that finally feels aligned. I'm talking about the tiny teaching moments we've been missing, why doing everything for our kids leaves everyone overwhelmed, and how building a business around your life—not your life around your business—changes everything.

If you've ever felt stretched too thin, guilty that you're missing the moments that matter, or wondered if you can really have a thriving business, a connected marriage, and a home you actually enjoy... this episode is for you.

Do you ever feel like summer just happens to you?

Between family obligations, traditions, sports schedules, vacations, and trying to keep everyone happy, it's easy to spend the entire summer reacting instead of intentionally creating the season you actually want.

I'm sharing a simple exercise my husband and I used to create our "Fun Summer List" and why getting specific about what lights you up can completely change your marriage, your family life, and your summer. We'll talk about planning fun first, letting go of outdated traditions, creating more luxury in everyday moments, and why the best summers aren't the most expensive—they're the most intentional.

If you're ready for a summer that feels energizing, aligned, and truly yours, this episode is for you.

We've been taught that being a strong woman is something to be proud of. We hustle, push through, carry the load, and prove that we can handle anything life throws at us. But what if constantly being "the strong one" is actually keeping us from the partnership we crave?

I'm sharing why vulnerability is often much harder than strength, how control creates distance in marriage, and why so many women find themselves exhausted, resentful, and carrying more than their share. We'll explore the hidden cost of always being capable, the parent-child dynamic that can quietly develop in marriage, and the surprising path back to true partnership.

If you've ever found yourself saying, "Fine, I'll just do it myself," this episode is for you. Because the marriage you're longing for doesn't require more strength. It requires more truth, more honesty, and the courage to let yourself be seen.

Are you feeling more like your husband's mother than his partner?

I'm diving into why so many women unintentionally fall into a parent-child dynamic in marriage and how it creates resentment, exhaustion, and disconnection. We'll explore where these patterns come from, why they're so familiar, and most importantly, how to shift into a true partnership where both people feel supported, capable, and valued.

If you're tired of carrying the mental load, managing everyone else's life, and feeling like you're doing it all, this episode will help you create a new dynamic—one built on trust, ownership, and connection.

Do you find yourself saying things like "he never helps," "we're always arguing," or "our marriage is failing"?

What if none of those things are actually true?

Today, we're exploring polarity thinking—the tendency to see life, marriage, and the people we love through a black-and-white lens. Your brain loves labels. Good or bad. Right or wrong. Success or failure. But healthy marriages don't live in extremes. They live in the nuance, the complexity, and the thousands of shades in between.

This week, I’m sharing a deeply personal milestone: after 19 years behind the chair, I’m officially retiring from the salon and stepping fully into the next chapter of my life and business. Along the way, I’ve learned some powerful lessons about fear, alignment, work, family, and what it really means to create a life that supports who you are becoming.

We’ll talk about why so many women feel exhausted, disconnected, and overwhelmed, the courage it takes to follow your own path, and why fear is often a sign that you're doing something bold. I’ll also share my unconventional business plan, how I balance work and family, and why I believe you can build a business, marriage, and life that truly lights you up.

This week I’m talking about the messy middle of life — the moments where I question myself, doubt myself, want to give up, and wonder if I’ll ever make it to the other side. Through stories about motherhood, marriage, business, nervous system regulation, and even hiking in the Adirondacks with my family, I’m sharing how I’ve learned to stop abandoning myself when things get hard and instead trust myself enough to keep going. If you’ve been feeling stuck, overwhelmed, or discouraged lately, this episode will remind you that maybe nothing has gone wrong at all — you’re simply in the middle of the loop.

Please join us at Marriage & Mocktails June 6 register here: www.brookesann.com/events 

or if your ready to take your life to the next level click here to apply to join my transformational program : www.brookesann.com/apply 

Today we’re talking about something that feels almost rebellious in today’s world… doing less.

Less noise. Less multitasking. Less productivity. Less scrolling. Less trying to fix everything.

Because maybe the answer to the overwhelm, disconnection, frustration, and exhaustion isn’t more. Maybe it’s less.

Ever feel like you can’t fully count on your husband to follow through?

Like you ask him to do something… and he forgets. Or does it on his own timeline. Or you find yourself constantly reminding him—and resenting him for it.

In this episode, I’m breaking down a real-life listener question that so many women will relate to.

But this isn’t just about forgotten tasks or unmet expectations.

This is about the deeper dynamic happening underneath it all.

Because the truth is… your husband isn’t broken.
He’s patterned. And so are you.

This blog will challenge you—in the best way.

Because your power isn’t in getting him to change.
It’s in how you relate to who he already is.

Why does sex feel so complicated in marriage?

If you’ve ever felt like something is wrong with you because you don’t want sex as much as your husband…or sex feels stressful, pressured, disconnected, or simply not enjoyable—you are not alone.

We’re having a very honest conversation about intimacy, desire, shame, nervous system regulation, pleasure, trauma, hormones, and the stories women carry around sex. I’m breaking down why you can’t “should” yourself into desire, the difference between arousal and desire, how shame quietly kills intimacy, and why pleasure—not obligation—is the goal.

We’ll also talk about how healthy marriages create space for two whole people with different needs, preferences, and seasons of life to communicate honestly and care for their relationship together.